Thursday, May 17, 2012

The three of us

I question daily if I left my heart in Oklahoma when I moved. I have a sense of peace, comfort, happiness, and love that seems to be unmatched as I fumble through my new life here in a new place. It could be that I have spent most of my adult life in the heartland, it could be that I have so many great memories (I choose to turn the not so great memories into learning experiences so as a result everything in life is a great memory), it could be that my best friends reside in the state of waving wheat, it could be that my family also known as my oxygen calls Oklahoma home, or it could be that a little man so important in to my life, it takes my breath away thinking he is no longer with us in flesh, is laid to rest in the beauty of the plains. Bryce passes away a little over 10 years ago and I can not only speak on behalf of my life but on behalf of our entire family, on March 30, 2002 our lives changed forever. Bryce was so young when our Lord took him home, yet I learned more from his gentle soul, saw more love is his eyes, and experience more happiness flowing out of that little man than I see in most adults. I feel it is such a mild phrase to say he blessed my life beyond compare, but I don’t know how to put into words my love, gratitude, and happiness to have had him in my life, even for such a short time. For years I was not strong enough to go visit Bryce, I suppose I had a lot of unresolved emotions that have been broken into and are being address during this most recent and continuing journey I have been on. So with new found strength and the uncovering of the woman I have always been, simply hiding behind the pain and coping skills I chose in life, I went to visit Bryce.
After a day of rain and clouds Maggie and I arrived at the grave site to a beautiful sunset, I felt Bryce was there with Maggie and I. It was just the three of us, laughing, smiling, taking in the beauty that only appears as colors exit the Oklahoma sunset skies. We enjoying our time with Bryce and taking the time to shoot a few pictures of the gorgeous sunset over the wheat field.
Bryce loved harvest and as the wheat is nearing the harvest point I knew he was there with us in spirit. Little man, I guess not a little man anymore, you would be nearly 17 years old…..I miss you more with each passing day, but I know you would not want any of us to sit here paralyzed in sadness and pain, you would want us to live our lives to the fullest just as you did in your 6 years with us here on earth. I love you buddy!!!

No comments:

Post a Comment