What a riveting expression I know, however it is the only phrase I can think of which to adequately express my emotions towards all the responses I received regarding my heartfelt glance into the one thing missing in my life. Warnings were shouted out before you dove too far into the longings of my soul, warnings that my words were going to be shocking, in fact they might even knock you over. I suppose my attempts to shelter you all from the blow went unnoticed and the ramblings of a lonely heart were heard by many.
The reaction to this scatter cowboy rambling varied from a co-worker that had the biggest smile on her face when she walked in my office the other day and said “I read your blog last night, how fun”. To my mother, whose reaction was quite the opposite stating “have you lost your mind, you need a cowboy like you need a hole in your head, country life is not you AT ALL”.
It is time for a confession of sorts; I find myself torn in deciphering what my heart really needs and wants and what my mind thinks my life is missing. Although I welcome the thought of a cowboy in my life with open arms, I do have to admit that I am not 100% sure this city girl could hack it in the country. I can say with all the certainty I can muster that my stiletto collection would not survive an hour much less a day in the country. It would not take long before my stiletto got stuck in the mud and my life as I know it would be no more. I would be willing to trade in a pair of heals for cowgirl boots if I fell in love with an amazing cowboy, but only one pair.
As a side bar, visualizing is something I learned to do very well while being part of the Interior Design program in college but I am having a hard time visualizing these feet……….
in stirrups, ridin’ a horse.
We won’t go into how the jewelry,
and the designer sunglasses would weather the country life.
However, even though I had more “WHAT ARE YOU THINKING?” reactions to my longing for a cowboy commentary, I will remain optimistic. Regardless of the fact that I think I could fall in love with anyone who stole my heart, I also know that in practical terms I would have a better chance at falling in love with someone that spends time doing the same things as I. May be on the running trails, or at the gym, or building a house for Habitat for Humanity, or on the ski slopes, or volunteering at church, or at a photography gathering, or at a race; those seem a lot more practical. In addition I don’t spend a lot of time in the country on ranches. In fact I spend no time there unless I am visiting family. But who needs practicality when we have a life designed to be spent looking at the future through the optimistic lends. Only God knows where this lonely heart will land, I am simply hoping that someday it will land in the arms of a man with Cowboy Ethics, regardless if he drives a truck or a Range Rover, lives in the country or in the city, his heart is what counts.